Why Santa Didn't Make it to Your House

Why Santa didn’t show.

Don’t you love modern technology? And it is good to see some of the older generation taking part in the marvels of today..

Why even Santa Claus uses high tech to speed up his work.

Last year a few homes participated in the SantaClausDirect beta version test, and this year most people used the now out of Beta SantaClaus Direct vs1.00025 which is now known as Abighohoho. Yes, soon letters to Santa will be so yesterday. In these modern times Santa Claus, doesn't have to read every letter from everyone and answer it, No, not anymore for he now uses a high tech Blackberry with wireless internet to contact the next home on his list. Yep, Santa is with it, he uses all the high tech stuff to speed his work up and get those presents delivered. On his sleigh he carries a few of everything anyone would ever want for Christmas…and people make their requests to Santa, a few minutes before his arrival on their roof. He goes online and gets the next person he is to visit on an audio link on the Blackberry.

Here is a transcript of a visit of Santa's where all the dealing was done the modern way.

Santa, Santa Claus, is it really you?

**************

Santa I couldn't hear your reply...too much raindeer farting going on....I am sure you can hear me, so I'll go ahead and put in my order.

I want a Peterbilt for Christmas.

**************

No, no, Santa, mine is fine, I want a TRUCK.

**************

Over my Dead Body Fat Guy.

**************

TRUCK, T. R. U. C. K. a Peterbuilt TRUCK!!!!!!

**************

You been in the eggnog again? I said I want a truck.

**************

Maybe this will help Bozo,

I want something to get down the road.

**************

No, no big guy,

I don't frequent those kind of houses, well not very often.

I just want something to truck with.

**************

NoNONo....hey big guy

I just want to do it on the road.

With a Peterbilt.

**************

No, no you don't understand,

I want a good truck

**************

Out of respect for the next of kin, I have redacted all of Santa’s recorded words here

With **************

Santa would still be alive today if his hearing aid had not quit working shortly before He got to my house.

©2006 web_loafer